Tuesday, April 1, 2008

I Have Had a Breakthrough

This is kind of a long story.....

I started my October piece way back when. It's theme was Community. My belief up to that point was that my first ring of community would have been my family, they would have been my first line of support. I would work on my page and try to work through what turned up to be one of my biggest issues. I found myself not being able to complete or even put a dent in that piece.
After I had caught up with my pages I went back to it, I tried beading on it several more times. I would work on it for a few minutes and have to put it down. I was feeling frustrated and abandoned. It came to a head when I went to the opening of the Beads of Whimsy show. The Fairy Crown I had worked so hard on for the last 6 months had made it into the show. I handed out postcards to family and friends inviting them to the opening.

Not one of my family came.

But I was surrounded by friends. As I was driving home I realized I had to rethink my idea of community. I had to let go of my ideal old community and embrace the new.
So my October Community page was thrown in the garbage.

And I started the new October page - Breakthrough. I gathered all the beads and charms and doo-dads that my friends had given me. I added in pieces of myself, things I had collected from up north at my "happy place". These items became the center of my page. I beaded the outer page just like a page. Then I added what I consider the rips of the paper, like someone (myself) had shot a hole though it. Maybe I had just shot a hole through my old theory.

I read somewhere that to have a breakthrough you have to have a breakdown. It worked. I love this page.

Plus I finished this page last night. I then preceded to put a few beads on my March piece in March! I almost feel caught up!


coral-seas said...

This is a beautiful piece of beading but of course, it's true beauty is in what it has done for you. I am sorry that you had to 'break down' to get to this point, but very pleased for you that you've broken through.


abeadlady said...

Oh, I love this. You hit the concept right on the nose.

Isn't it strange how your perceptions can change as you get older. I had a similar experience and wouldn't change my "adopted family" for anything. Friends are the best.


Robin said...

OMG, I am soooooo proud of you for getting to the bottom of this issue and breaking through to a wonderful new reality!!!!! I'm in awe that you've been doing this at the same time as designing a website. Can't wait to meet you in person!

GraceBeading said...

Wonderful post as well as an amazing bead journal page. Thanks for sharing so much of yourself, I find it very inspiring

KV said...

So awesome, Brenda . . . life does have its twists and turns but eventually we do discover the best of it.

Kathy V in NM

beadbabe49 said...

Perfect and beautiful image for the concept...bravo!

Hélène H said...

Amazing stuff, I am in awe !

freebird said...

Wow. What a journal page! You did a great job of showing a breaking through! And what a great way to honor the ones who are there for you in your art. I don't know why I keep on doing it, but I keep asking my family to look at my blog. They say they look but they don't leave comments and they don't mention it unless I bring it up. Families can be a source of joy but they can also be big pains in the behind!! I am so glad you are able to have friends to support you. I feel like the BJP is doing that for me. Without all of you I wouldn't have the support I need for my art.